My (not so) love affair with Art Journaling

Once again, I'm faced with the fact that I love to look at artist's art journals but I do not love to create them. Let me be more specific. Pages with paint and collage and images and words do not come easily to me, nor do they particularly "speak" to me or "say" what I necessarily feel. I've done plenty of these pages, including several of Kelly Kilmer's classes. These pages take a lot of effort and rarely am I pleased with the outcome. These are not books I return to look through. Books I pull down from the shelf and look through are:

• Visual Journals (where I "record" my life)
• Doodle Journals - mandalas, creative doodles
• Travel Journals
• Art Journals that are more art-y than collage-y

So, with two recent books, I realize this isn't my thing. At least the Journaling by 5's book hasn't taken that much time due to the 15 minute sessions. And I have a full book (35 pages!) either finished or ready for the next stage. All done within a 2 week timeframe ... this would have taken months to do. So ...

What I like about this process: Working in one medium at a time ... paint, stamp/stencil, random collage, pen/marker work. Working on several pages at a time (although not in the same book unless I figure out what to put between the pages that won't stick). Timed sessions - gets you out of your head and into the process quickly.

What I don't like is: the timed sessions for "focal points" ... Actually I don't much like the focal points. I realize that I love to create backgrounds. That's what I really enjoy (backgrounds that I use to make scrappy journals). I also don't like ruining pens and markers trying to write on paint and medium. 

So, these pages are ready for me to do whatever is next. At this point, I have no idea where they will go (if anywhere). I will spend some time with this book, not considerable time. But there is the challenge of bringing it to a point where I feel good (or at least better) about it ... and feel a sense of completion (which is one of the BIGGEST challenges I have as an artist).

And I'll continue to enjoy looking at other artist's pages ... but I think I'll let this go. I'm ready to move on.

Sorting, sorting, sorting

Recently, I've been struggling with something ... what kind of art do I really want to do? It all started a few weeks (months?) back when I began to sort my art room. I removed all the piles of things on top of surfaces and on the floor ... removed them to our guest room. That led to sorting drawers, paper and fabric. Okay ... progress. Empty art table, sorted drawers. Now what. 

Since that initial burst of energy, slowly projects have been brought back into the space. Projects that seem interesting for a day or two. Then something else catches my fancy ... and I'm off in search of stuff in the other room to bring back. Currently my art space has six projects in various stages. Once again, all the stuff mingles (paint, fabric, beads, unfinished books) ... mingles to create a visual chaos. Once again, I make an item on my "to do" list to clear it all off.

Last week I had an idea ... only have one (maximum two) project out at once. Pick something to do and do it for the week. Try not to be distracted (which means stay off the computer where I'm constantly inspired!). Try to make progress with this one (or two) projects. Try to keep in mind that I can always do something else next week.

So today, I'll be selected my projects. My 2nd half 2014 planner which I'm making and one other - not sure which of the remaining 5 I'll choose. The rest will be moved to the guest room. 

Yesterday, my inner mentor sent me a strong message. Seek art projects that bring me joy, make me happy. Do those. Only do those. Let the rest go (ya know, all those things that other people do that inspire me but don't fulfill me). My inner mentor suggests that if I only work on things that bring me joy, I will actually find that inner voice that I've sought for years (and have written about before).

So, in thinking about this, these are 10 art projects that bring me joy:

1. Creative doodles
2. Using these to create greeting cards
3. Making scrappy journals; bookbinding
4. Visual documenting my life (in my scrappy journals)
5. Fabric collage - creating art quilts
6. Hand stitching and beading
7. Creating background pages; decorating with everyday stuff (sometimes used in #3)
8. Playing with photos
9. Creating postcards with these altered photos
10. Funky fibers - knitting, weaving

That's still a large list ... but it's a place to start as I continue this journey (and as I sort through the piles that have gathered throughout the last few years.)

"Creativity is a pathway to personal and spiritual growth"

~ Janice Elsheimer

Artist voice ... or what, exactly, do I want to say?

Connie Rose wrote in a recent blog post about why one creates. It was like reading my own creative journey. Connie, like me, has also taken numerous courses, tried many techniques, and has invested in a lot of art supplies. She still hasn't found "her place" or what I have continually referred to as my "artist voice." It's what I seek, and seek, and seek (with every new course, with every new book, with every new click on a blog).

Connie talks about nothing deep and meaningful appearing ... needing to be expressed. Wow ... that's me! That's why art journaling is so unsatisfying to me. I let my deep self express in my written morning pages. When there is something to ponder, I write about it. That satisfies my need to express and over the years has shown insights and surprises and confirmations. I can't imagine a morning without writing. Putting image or color to the words doesn't add to the expression. I don't have that 'aha' moment others talk about.

Recently I cleared out my 'studio' of all "miscellaneous stuff" on surfaces. Filled the guest room. I mean filled it. Stuff that has gotten put on top of carts or on the floor, or stuffed into bags. Stuff that represents ideas or new art supplies that came home and never found a use or storage place. Bags of stuff "I'll use someday."

That was quite freeing. To see my art table and sewing table and desk clear ... beautiful open space. I decided I'd eventually begin to organize the stuff. Started with my carts containing fabric. Then I decided to only bring back into the art space what I was working on. What a novel concept. I can actually find the fabric and embroidery floss ... it is no longer hidden under the pile of stuff.

So, what does this have to do with my "artist voice"? By clearing my space and thinking about what I'll bring back in, I've learned ...

• I love color
• I love fabric and fibers
• I love making scrappy journals
• I love documenting my life in scrappy journals
• I love to doodle
• I love to take photographs

These things bring me joy. I feel satisfied when I'm engaged in any of these things.

I think the best way to describe what I want to express is 'happiness'. I'd like my work to bring a smile. I'd like it to elicit "That's pretty!" Shallow? Yes, for sure. However, I don't believe the world suffers from too much prettiness or beauty or happiness. So, for now, my artist voice is clearly expressing itself through colorful and playful art. For now, that is enough.